


no place like home

by Antarktica



Series: Run [3]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, Companionship, Episode: Fault, Episode: Paternity, F/M, Friendship, I am sorry not sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-26
Updated: 2018-04-26
Packaged: 2019-04-28 03:35:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14440587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antarktica/pseuds/Antarktica
Summary: She'd been running a long time now.





	no place like home

            If she’d found herself on his stoop, she’d call herself foolish. If she’d found herself crying, in his arms, she’d call herself a coward. A selfish coward. She thinks these words to herself, but he brushes it away when he wipes the tears away from her face. Comfort envelops her like a cocoon. She’d stay wrapped around in his arms for eternity, if she could.

            Its times like these she’s reminded, sometimes, she _has_ him. She _could have_ him. But only for these few moments. Moments where they touch unexpectedly or expectedly, moments where she’d forget they never did this. It was always silence with them. A look in the eye, if there was touching, it’s usually just on the arm, on the shoulder, and sometimes a comforting hand over the other—but never his arms wrapped around her waist, not her head cradled and resting on the crook of his neck.

            She’d been running a long time now. Kathy, the baby, they’d gotten into an accident. And she, Olivia, blames herself for every bit of it. It ate her inside between the lines of waiting to know if Kathy was okay. If the baby was okay. If she did enough to save them. If she did enough to not fail Elliot.

            He comes out of the room and talks to her, knocking her out of her reverie. She’s so lost, _so lost_. He tells her Kathy decided to name the baby Eli. _Just what the world needs, another Elliot Stabler._  Elliot walks ahead of her then, and she knows their talk was done, but he turns back and hugs her.

            She froze. She’d been running a long time and he easily caught up with her and stopped her on her marks. Her body unwillingly trembles in his grasps and he cradles her closer, _it’s fine, you did more than good, Liv_. _I’m glad you’re safe too._

            They never did this. They never did any sort of physical contact close to this. It was a line they’d never cross. A line they promised, swore to never cross. They weren’t fraternizing with each other, _dear God they hoped it was as simple as that—but_ this—this was much more dangerous than that. They know they’re pouring each other’s feelings out in the open. That’s why they don’t touch frequently. It’s always as if a bomb is threatening to go off.

            It’s long but fleeting. Before Elliot pulls away from their embrace, he’d left a chaste on her temples. Olivia wasn’t sure if he meant it, she looked into his eyes, finding answers, asking him a question _Did you mean that?_   He smiled at her when her eyes met his. _I do._

            _Liv! Are you hit?_

            Elliot immediately catches her right after Rojas was shot, thinking she was the one who got hit. He cradled her in his arms, he only realized he stopped breathing until Olivia clutched his arms and told him it was Rojas’ blood not hers. It was for but a short moment, but he cupped her face in his hands and held onto her like she was _dear life_.

            Olivia knows what he meant. Olivia knows what this meant. She never says she does. But Elliot knows; when he meets her halfway by the hallway, ready to wrap his arms around her as she does him. Sonya— _I should’ve come back sooner,_ he says, and Olivia agrees. Even though she gave him her word, that she’ll be fine.

            He should’ve returned home _sooner._ Her hands clutches to his clothes too tightly. God, she missed him. _She needed him_.

_Fin may have your six but he’s not me._

            And he was right. Too damn right. Her breath almost hitches when he pulls her into him and she clings to him, out of instinct. Her anchor. _Her_ partner. Just for this moment, he is _hers._      

            _I’m fine._ She says as she pulls away, wiping away the tears from her face. _Like hell you are._ She has always been unable to fool him. She was vulnerable. Olivia Benson was always vulnerable to Elliot Stabler. She could barely look him in the eye. She mumbles something about getting the work done. She always does.

            Run.

            That was all she wanted to do. That’s all she ever does. That’s what she did.

**Author's Note:**

> There's like 3 more of these left. Don't ask me why I make myself suffer so much. Thanks for reading !


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